People say that there is no love without jealousy, but that’s not true. Jealousy is a serious problem which often ruins relationships or lowers the quality of life. Today I’m going to tell you how exactly jealousy arises and what to do in order to deal with this feeling and not let it negatively influence your relationship. It will be very practical knowledge.
The first step to limit a negative impact of jealousy is calmness. Even if you think that you have valid reasons for being jealous, do not transfer your frustration onto your partner, because you will only hurt yourself.
Notice – people who are really in love with someone are rather not prone to be unfaithful. They are focused on their partners and they are not looking for random adventures. If you suspect your partner is unfaithful or could be unfaithful, it’s probably a result of the fact that he or she is not showing you enough attention. That’s why it’s visible that the emotional balance between you is already disrupted. Your partner is showing less interest in you while you are showing more. If you show your jealousy, you will show, in a negative way, that you care about your partner, and you will further disrupt the emotional balance in your relationship.
If something bothers you a lot, you should talk about it with your partner. But do it in a positive way – tell you partner how you’re feeling and ask your boyfriend or girlfriend if they could stop behaving in such a way, but do it calmly and without blaming anyone. Do not demand anything or try to ban anything since it will only repel the other person.
On the other hand, the feeling of jealousy sometimes appears in completely unreasonable cases. Sometimes jealousy may be caused by your suspicions or insecurity, not the actual events. If you become convinced that you partner is unfaithful, your mind, just like a filter, will choose the smallest information from the environment in order to justify this conviction. It’s easy to become paranoid in this way.
If you want to feel better and get rid of jealousy, you have to assume that your partner is 100% faithful. Trust is essential not for your partner, but for you – thanks to the fact that you trust your partner, you can maintain peace of mind.
Instead of looking for evidence of a love affair, try to look for signs that your partner is faithful.
Even if you suspect that he or she is having a love affair, do not control your partner as it will only make the whole situation worse. You will be even more suspicious and your mind will exaggerate even the smallest things and make them look as big offences.
Try to approach the situation with the following attitude: “Come what may”, or “Let’s see what happens.” You will be able to soothe your shattered nerves only when you decide to let go and accept reality, no matter what it looks like. I know that such an attitude may be hard (“You have to prevent it! You cannot let your partner cheat on you!”), but the truth is that you cannot guard the other person. If he or she wants to, they will be unfaithful no matter what.