|Let's start with a saying: "Never make the same mistake twice". If someone uses this saying as an argument why they are not going to return to the ex-partner, that means they don’t know what they are talking about. Let me explain to you the process that takes place at almost every breakup (excluding relationships where feelings have been gone for a long time).|
Let's assume that a girl is drifting apart from her boyfriend, the emotional balance in this relationship is heavily tilted against him, she has been thinking about breakup for a long time and finally she breaks up with him. Even though at the moment of breakup this girl is sure she doesn't want to be with him anymore - something strange is happening there . While the boy simply accepts this decision and won't desperately beg for a comeback, a few hours after the breakup the girl begins to have doubts as to whether it was certainly a good decision, because she suddenly realizes that she is at the moment in her life when she may lose this boy for ever. And even though it was her decision, the boy becomes much more challenging. Because of this, the girl begins to care more and if he doesn't make any big mistakes, she may want to get back to him again. This mechanism protects relationships from breakup and for this particular reason, some couples break up just for a short time, e.g. for a day or a week. In some relationships, such short breakups take place many times. This effect works on both men and women. As a matter of fact, this theory has never been proven scientifically, but for many years when I have been working with people, I regularly observe something like this myself and I am sure that many of you can confirm it as well.
So when is it worth to get back with your ex, regardless of how much time has passed since the breakup? The answer remains very individual till the end, but there are several factors that will perhaps make you give your partner a chance.
1. Consider a comeback if the breakup happened based on emotion. Sometimes arguments get out of control and end up with a breakup, but it doesn't mean that we shouldn't fix this mistake once this all simmers down
2. If this is your first try to break up, strongly consider the comeback. Even if you told your girlfriend or boyfriend how much something bothers you and they didn't listen and did their thing, at the moment of breakup they get a powerful emotional kick and it could finally get through to them. Consider why not give him/her a second chance, if you see that he/she realized his/her mistakes.
3. Think about giving your partner a second chance if the reason for the breakup was his cheating, but there is no indication that he still has an affair with that person. In such situations, it happens very often that the person who cheated has terrible remorse and suffers terribly because of this. Think carefully whether one stupid mistake must always cross out the whole relationship.
4. Consider why not give your partner a second chance if you see that after the breakup he changed and started to work on himself.
When it's not worth to get back with your partner:
1. When there is no indication that he has changed or understood something, but you just feel emptiness after the breakup. That feeling is going to ease off soon. Don't let him fool you.
2. If it is not your first breakup, you probably shouldn't get back with your partner.
3. When the relationship has been toxic for a long time .
4. When you partner cheated on you and is still in touch with that person.
5. And certainly not when your partner is threatening you with committing suicide. Comeback out of pity makes no sense at all. Keep in touch with them to make them familiar with the situation but don't get back to them.
If you want to check your chances to be with your ex again, please take a short and completely free test.
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See you next week!